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Merman archiveThis Merman question and answer was brought to you in the May/June issue. Dear Merman, Whenever the weekend rolls around I find myself frantically trying to clean the house and get organized for another busy week. My husband assumes his usual position on the couch or floor flipping through the channels. What is the best way to inspire my husband to help around the house more on the weekends? Do you like a "honey-do list"? Signed, Tired of backbreaking weekend work. Answer from the Deep: Dear Back Broken Mermaid, The answer to this question depends on whether you and your husband both work full time out of the home or either of you are "stay-at-homes." I will answer it both ways. If you both work full time out of the home then your Merman needs to step up and help out. A honey-do list works great under a couple of "merman conditions." First, like any list of objectives, make it achievable. Don't give the poor boy a list the length of your arm and expect him to get excited about it. Since he is a weekend couch barnacle already break him in slowly. Give him a list with no more than three achievable tasks – preferably all of which can be accomplished easily on Saturday. Also, be organized enough to give him the list on Wednesday so he can prepare himself for it and also let him know there will be a reward for good behavior. Once he is working on his chores do not commit the cardinal sin! Do not, and I repeat do not add anything to the list, especially while he is working on one of the three achievable tasks. That, once again, makes it feel like there is no end in sight to this list and worse yet like he has been suckered into work mode. A tsunami of rebellion is sure to follow. Give yourself an achievable list also, (make sure he knows you have one too) and be satisfied with what gets accomplished on Saturday. Even at 20,000 leagues, Sunday is a day of rest. Confine your work to Saturday and take time to appreciate your work, your family and your relationship on Sunday. There are 51 other Saturdays to follow so everything does not have to get done THIS Saturday! As far as inspiration there is no Merman on earth that doesn't like a reward at the end of the task road. Take the initiative and guarantee him an exciting time in your private clamshell Saturday night IF he accomplishes his tasks for the day. A little reminder half way through the day doesn't hurt either. I know, I know, maybe he should be ‘the one', but a Merman loves a woman that takes the initiative! If one of you IS a "stay-at-home" then that one needs to quit whining like a sick porpoise, get the house stuff (with the exception of two person projects) done on a more regimented Monday through Friday schedule (just like the out of home worker has done) so when you get to the weekend you can spend both days together doing something fun, relaxing and recharging. With the price of gas lately for navigation around your earth bound locations you can save money by vacationing at home IF home is comfortable, cleaned and ready to use to entertain yourselves. Repeat again next week. "The Merman" |
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